Nancy Reagan: History’s Handmaiden

America’s Widow® In Myth & Legend    

What can’t we recall about Eternal Former First Lady Nancy Reagan?

A chronicle of her death foretold!

Barack Obama’s shocking reference to Nancy’s astrology interests.

How Nancy pioneered fashion grifting, clearing the path for Sarah Palin.

With the Reagan Library running out of things to say, Nancy came to the rescue with a show about the many fancy dresses she somehow acquired during her Washington years.

Nancy’s Sacramento Legacy: California’s homeless Governors.

How the Reagan Library, Nancy Reagan Impresario, managed to bring cult religion to a 9/11 memorial.

When Nancy paused from Reagan monument unveiling to pile up more cash for the Reagan Library, the most grotesquely overstuffed of our nation’s presidential mausoleums.

That time Nancy teamed up with a noted Congressional whorehound to get Ronnie’s statue into the Capitol building on the double.

When she worked to squeeze out naysayers, or anyone independent, from the Reagan centennial Commission.

How the Reagan Library found room for Nancy’s dresses, notes from Ronnie and a god damn Boeing 707, but somehow can’t cover Iran-Contra because it lacks “freshness.”

Her Saudi diamond trove.

How love of her life Ronald Reagan was bonking Doris Day in the runup to marrying a pregnant Nancy.

That time “Just Say No” nostalgia failed to put John McCain over the top.

When they photo shopped Nancy’s head  into the dedication of the Reagan aircraft carrier. 

 

When the Reagan Library lost all that stuff.

                  What’s your favorite #NancyMemory?

 

 

 

 

Barack Obama, Grave Robber

Who’s Crying Now?  Reagan-Obama.jpg (500×375)

From his controversial campaign embrace of Reagan nostalgia onward, Barack Obama has set Fantasy Reagan as the standard to be measured against.  But he’s lacked the twinkling whimsy to pull off the big whoppers Reagan could do with half a brain, and the shamelessness of his handlers in putting them across.

But now, light from the East.

Obama was already three up on the Gipper in the coveted killing Qaddafi relatives category, hitting a son and three grandchildren. Reagan had to make to do with his sole Qaddafi hit, the adopted daughter killed when the US bombed Libya in 1986.

Now the rebel conquest of Tripoli threatens even that Reagan accomplishment.  The Irish Times reports from the wreckage that Hana Qaddafi may have never died, and had gone on to a career as a doctor.

The Reagan bomb run was storied in legend and song, featuring daring-do, plucky Maggie Thatcher as Churchill in drag, and the perfidious French.

But now all we may have gotten out of it was the Lockerbie bombing.


Revenging Reagan: You Can’t Libel A Dead Man!

Any Number Can Play! photo Eager Republican National Committee beavers want you to send birthday greetings to the ghost of Ronald Reagan, and appear to be shunting them onto the Twitter without editing.Pranksters have already had at it, and you can join the conversation here.How do you remember Ronald Reagan?

Foundering!

McNaughton’s Group   http://api.photoshop.com/home_e4b2cc204d524b3d823d04799a29b3dd/adobe-px-thumbnails/e065d085ea3e420992072ea49f8ed957/1024.jpg?md=1283986880000

Special thanks to the eagle eyes at Wonkette, who’ve spotted a big one.

Extraordinarily cheezeball artist Jon McNaughton has brought forth a gathering of greats, as the ghosts of presidents past hover around sullen, stand-offish looking Barack Obama, variously annoyed or aghast at his literal TRAMPLING ON THE CONSTITUTION!

McNaughton is the kind of crank who rambles along in incoherent Founderspeak for numbered paragraphs, passive aggressively concluding:

“The information is historical. If it is not familiar to you – Google it.

Cramming all these figures into the frame seems to have skewed McNaughton’s perspective.  Small but perfectly formed James Madison is so upset at Obama’s boot-heel to our liberties that he’s bent over pleading, but appears to be almost Obama’s height.   The Forgotten Man is a giant seated on a toy town bench. Such is the occasion that Franklin Roosevelt walks.

McNaughton’s painting doesn’t leave much to chance, featuring ominous clouds, flags at half staff, and an accompanying video lush with  piano chords of doom.

Ronald Reagan: Live The Fantasy!

Republican Tinkerbell

The thoughtful press peepers at Media Matters For America [just typing it gives a tingle!] have detected a pattern in Republican affairs:  free-floating New Reagan naming, often not tied to any visible speaking skill or charisma.

Christie On A Stick! 

They run down the usual names named, your Palins, Rubios and the like, but several of the reborn seem to have escaped their view.

Lest we forget, some have imagined the mantel falling on Rubio’s leathery opponent, Charlie Crist.  Before his auditioning to become the Robert Byrd of the desert wastelands,  John McCain was considered amoung the Reagan Undead. Until he stumbled into a cracker history morass Virginia Governor Robert F. “Bob” McDonnell was seen, at least in Pat Robertson’s alternative universe, as Reaganesque. And South Korean hard man President Lee Myung-bak was Reagan walking until it was discovered voters didn’t thrill to the prospect of confrontation with the North.

But our favorite New Reagan of Today lives in South Africa:

zuma-dances.jpg  step forward President Zuma!