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Bringing Back Barack     

 

Driven from the streets of Jakarta, the boy-statue of Barack Obama has found a home at Obama’s childhood school, or as Fox viewers know, his madrassa.

The Awesome Power Of Social Media® mobilized Indonesian citizen or some kind of outrage at public space being used to honor Obama, with motivations ranging from disapproval of  him to disapproval of his wars.  Despite the latter, American Obama haters joined the fun, although their racist infested site no longer appears on Facebook.

Obama may see the statue on a March visit to Indonesia.

Grant Me This 

It was a gathering of the conservative faithful at CPAC this past weekend, and the search for novel political analogies reached strange new heights.

Among the oddities was Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty, whose doomed Presidential campaign took its first tentative steps off the cliff by reminding the assembled Neo-Confederates    of a past glorius Republican office holder,  U.S. Grant.

Somehow today’s conservative struggle resembles Grant’s grinding Civil War victories over the South, his scandel infested administration, or his occasional lunges towards protecting blacks and Republicans from the Klan in the South. Which is unclear, but Pawlenty has his own upbeat, crackpot version:

“We’re on the side of limited government. And, like Grant, we fight.“

But perhaps not win.  Pawlenty came in fourth in CPAC’s presidential straw poll.

Also up for CPAC recycling,  Margeret Thatcher, AKA The Iron Lady.  Indiana Representative Mike Pence, straw poll fifth place holder, put America’s striking coal miners and Trotskyist local office holders on notice by evoking everyone’s favorite Churchill in drag. Just wait till that North Sea oil saves our ass!

A Romantic View Of History

Pence also entertained the crowd with a musty Ronald Reagan yarn, one where Reagan encountered a magic pipe-fitter.  This proto Joe The Plumber begged Reagan to save tax cuts for the rich, so guys like him could be hired by them.  Pence has trotted out the tale of this wondrous encounter at least twice going back to 2005.

CPAC turned to Glen Beck for insane historical tales with a grain of truth.

Peeing all over John McCain’s myth of a muscular progressive Republican past, Beck rightly called Teddy Roosevelt an interventionist.

But calling Roosevelt a socialist is as insane as labeling Obama one.

Behold These Goofs 

Unable to stage signing the “Mount Vernon Statement” at, um, Mount Vernon, massed conservatives held their event instead at the swanky Collingwood Library & Museum, a former dinner theatre venue  on property   once owned by George Washington and now available for wedding rentals.

Mount Vernon wouldn’t let them hold a political event on its grounds, so the free marketeers turned to their weapon of choice, and hired a hall.

Fox did its ungrammatical best to hang onto that fresh Founding Fathers smell:

“The signing ceremony is took place at a library that was part of George Washington’s Mount Vernon Estate. “

The New Nation/new grammar enthusiasm got the better of the Statement-os as well. Their classy yellow fake parchmentie web page recalls “selfevident truths.”

Further bizarre historical analogies came in the Statement-os comparison of themselves to the signers of the Sharon Statement,  a storied conservative event held at William F. Buckley’s Connecticut estate sixty years ago.  What mileage they achieve from Eisenhower era ties to a dead pot-smoking Iraq war opponent is unclear.
No Pillars To Post

 The State of Georgia offers this rib-tickler:

Union soldiers died from friendly fire while capturing Jefferson Davis!

“An ironic tale from the Civil War is told at Jefferson Davis Memorial Historic Site in Fitzgerald. A month after the war’s end, Confederate President Davis and a few remaining men were camped in south Georgia to continue their fight for the “lost cause.” At dawn, they were surrounded by two independent Union troops who began unknowingly firing at each other. Two Union cavalrymen died in the skirmish and Davis was taken prisoner. .. On Presidents Day, rangers will offer guided tours to all visitors. “

It’s Confederates, For Kids! 

Spirited efforts continue to normalize Confederate President Jefferson Davis and graft him onto real Presidents Day, but now cracker apologists have raised their sights:

they are going after Black History Month.

Rickey Pittman has cranked out two soft-core black/Confederate books, and has managed to get into school Black History Month programs to promote them.

“Jim Limber Davis: A Black Orphan In The Confederate White House”   is about the literal poster child of Rebel apologists: surely Jefferson Davis couldn’t be all bad if he “adopted” an African American orphan? 

And “Stonewall Jackson’s Black Sunday School”  seeks to show how dedicated the famed Confederate general was to the spiritual life of the people whose enslavement he fought to preserve.

Past Forgetting, For Kids!