Bordering On Shamelessness

Cruz In For A Disabusing? cruzflag

Despite brave talk about how next time it will all be different with their brown brethren, your New Look GOP is still, shall we say squeamish about them whats from elsewhere.

Which makes it all the more surprising that some have turned to an immigrant to get the job done in 2016.

Passing over dozens of qualified white males [and that New Hampshire gal ] Politico is thinking big again.  Hearts are reported aflutter for Texas dreamboat Ted Cruz, despite his Canadian birth.

An immigrant to do a job Americans could do.

Politico reports the speculation with a straight face, carefully ignoring recent Republican birther flirtations, which go unmentioned.  Our favorite birther sub-cult was the variation which reluctantly accepted Obama’s Hawaiian birth, but branched off into unique interpretations of the Constitution’s “natural born” language involving invented disqualification based on his father’s citizenship.

Similar circumstances [father not a citizen] would appear to disqualify Cruz, but as Politico folkish-ly allows, Ted “knows a thing or two about constitutional law.”

The Senate newbie is clearly interested in the issue, with spokesman Sean Ruston pre-loaded with this less than spontaneous line:

“Ted is a U.S. citizen by birth, having been born in Calgary to an American-born mother” 

Despite quoting multiple constitutional scholars, Politico takes a relaxed view of all this legal talk.  After reviewing the controversy over Panama Canal Zone born John McCain’s qualification, the article punts:

 

“The question of McCain’s eligibility was ultimately resolved not by a court but by his colleagues: The Senate approved a bipartisan resolution giving him the OK.”

 

Traditionally, “activist” Senators leave such determinations to the Judiciary, and I thought it was voters who cut short this spirited discussion, but whatever.

Politico assures us there’s no need for fussin.  They quote Teddy Roosevelt scion, constitutional scholar, and failed would-be John Grisham, Kermit “Kim” Roosevelt III:

“It’s a pretty significant step for the courts to say, ‘Hey America, you want this person to be president, we’re going to stop that’.” 

So never mind then and go on about your business.

Giant Obama Sparks The Usual Death Wish

Gritty!  

The chamber of commerce from Hooters’ hometown builds a sand sculpture near the Democratic Convention site, and people pretend to be shocked that its cheesy.

And the wingnut airforce rises in it’s fury to wish Barack Obama dead

Because lame pr stunting,often from the same clowns, has never disgraced past gatherings.

Dixon Illinois, 2011 

Myrtle Beach, SC 2008  

Myrtle Beach, SC 2012   

 

The Two Churchills: Barack Busted

Disappointing Office Seeker 

Barack Obama’s banishment of a Churchill bust from the Oval Office was a signature moment in his presidency, the disrespecting of our special relationship with Britain and source of endless mock conservative head-scratching, who wondered why anyone might be cool towards  the beloved Winnie. 

Some hearts thrilled.

Friday came word that everybody had it all wrong, the bust never left the White House, and rested in a place of great honor.

Heady Days  

But, sadly, no.

Rather then own up to their imperial blusterer banishment, the Obama White House tried to be cute, and got caught.  Two Churchill busts by the same sculpture have had a spot in the White House, one remains, and the Bush related one lives at the British embassy.

So Obama hadn’t taken a stand against imperialism, delivered a rebuke to Tony Blair’s Bush Poodle-ism, or spared the nation from Churchillian blowhard-ism.

Glory Days 

They dodged, made no one happy, and have now reinvigorated one of the right’s stale talking points which live in endless repetition on World Net Daily.

  Just when Mitt Romney’s bumptious London visit had displayed the the stupid pretension of the Churchill cult, the hearty iteration of Newt Gingrich’s “Kenyan, anti-colonial” crack-pottery.

The Path He Trod: Obama’s Student Housing Could Be Yours!

Room To Grow 

An apartment rented by Columbia transfer student Barack Obama is on the market.

Gawker summons up the truly unfortunate image of the future leader of the free world haunting these rooms, pulling the babes in his blue and white sarong, behavior which allegedly did transpire in later Obama apartments.

Let’s use this real estate blank slate to launch more imaginative lies about Obama’s Columbia period.  Previously we’ve enjoyed a fake Founder-slamming Obama thesis story sparked by the sinister Michael Ledeen missing the satire in the original, leading to Rush Limbaugh going wide with the story.  Obama was already linked to Chinese espionage by a fanciful chain of “evidence” linked to Manhatten’s Upper West Side already, so get to it!

 

The Mild, The Innocuous, & The K Street Shuffle

 

Over Done

                           

Fresh from mocking his real estate adventures, thoughtful observers have a new stick with which to beat mock socialogist David Brooks, while striking a glancing blow at Eternal President Ronald Reagan.

Brooks storied mendacity offends all right thinking folk, but now he’s throwing music into his pop culture poporiti, with comic results.

He’s joined the cult of Bruce Springsteen, with the added ickyness of traveling to observe The Boss’s caring antics in several of Europe’s tanking economies.

Nothing revulses like the clueless drawing vast conclusions from pretend empathy.

Bonus points to Alex Pareene and  “Mobutu Sese Seko” for recalling Springsteen inspired dimness of the Reagan era, when another Republican failed to strap Bruce to their caring conservatism.