This Always To Tourists


No end of woe as Springfield Illinois lumbers from loss to loss. Fewer tourists are visiting the home of the Abraham Lincoln Library and other, actual Lincoln sites, in a year when Chicago and downstate Illinois as a whole are up.

Hopes of turning it around may rest on a tourist guide where children can collect stamps from all the local sites, from the Museum of Funeral Customs [motto: “Death is Only the Beginning!”] to The Edwards Place, home of the Lincoln Courting Couch. Scattered early reports in the Springfield Journal Register have “a handful” or “two or three a day” tourists visiting sites bearing the guides, with 20,000 on the streets.

Citizens of Springfield! You can’t get a break.

The latest indignity to befall the Land of Lincoln is it’s snubbing by the producers of The Simpsons Movie, who held a bake-off of the nation’s Springfields to decide where to premiere the film next week.

Illinois’s effort was brightened by referencing the classic episode where Groundskeeper Willie doused the eternal flame on Adlai Stevenson’s grave. springfield-lincoln-simpsons.jpg

The full entry is really quite bad:

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